Old Poems

I am posting my old poems in my other blog:  http://andoynovel.blogspot.com

These are for those which I wrote during the 1980's.  I would not be editing them.  With regards, poems, I've decided to start fresh, creating new ones and just starting to learn how to write again.  I think that what differentiates my writing then and now is the discipline to put pen to paper.  To put in words the ideas and images I want to convey.

This would be fun.

--andoy

New Narrative and Old Poems

I'd be including my old poems in the other blog (How's the Carabao). This blog has a narrative about UP Los Banos, and the old poems fit in to this blog.

In the meantime, I'm writing new poems (almost twice a week) and will be posting these in this here weblog.

Just to segregate what I'm doing.

--andoy

Rant: Corruption in the Military and Sen. Miriam

The issue of corruption in the military is slowly boiling up to the surface. And in the forefront of the discussion is the avowed crusader against graft and corruption Senator Merriam Defensor-Santiago. Again the Filipino people is given a show of her english language skills (complete with the oft-parodied enunciation she got from who knows where). Her verbal skills are frightening: always trying to put an extra word for emphasis; and with multi-syllabic words, she lazily rolls the last syllable on her tongue. Sometimes, I think she loves the comma, inserting pauses (commas) like she was strewing humps on the road of to our understanding whatever she was saying.

Crazy lady.

With all the talk about the corrupt BIR and corrupt judges, she never, not once uttered a word for or against these people. I wonder if she was an heiress. That would be the only explanation for her extravagant lifestyle, something a former judge like her could not afford on a judge's salary. Then again, her husband did work himself up in the BIR's bureaucratic ladder. On the field, collecting and examing taxes.

Crazy.

--andoy

Celebrity: Paulina Rubio at the 2004 MTV Latin Video Music Awards

Celebrity

Paulina Rubio of Mexico, burning down the house with her fire engine red lingerie under a see-through dress. Great view from the back, too.

--andoy

New York Daily News - Daily Dish & Gossip - Buffing her image

New York Daily News - Daily Dish & Gossip - Buffing her image

"The Grudge" in English, with an American cast filmed in the original setting and by the original director.

The original movie was a great scream. The sequel lived up to the first movie. And seems that the newest (American) incarnation also lives up to expectations.

--andoy

Apple - iPod Photo

Apple - iPod Photo

If you think that the Apple iPod is limited to mp3s, the latest incarnation shows Apple finally flexing its muscles in a niche it controls. I am still asking myself why? Then again, everytime I ask that question, I hear myself asking both: "why not?" and "but why?"

Now if there's only a way for the iPod to connect to a digital camera. Or maybe for the next iPod to have a built-in camera. That would be "DAMN! 60GB and a camera."

--andoy

Isaac Newton's Gravity - How a major new exhibition gets the scientist wrong. By James Gleick

Isaac Newton's Gravity - How a major new exhibition gets the scientist wrong. By James Gleick

It is not common knowledge that Sir Isaac Newton was still in his early years when he published his greatest works, and almost nothing afterwards. It is almost unknown that he was obsessed with alchemy, in general, and in mercury in particular. To the scientific community this is as near to blasphemy as any.

Oh well. Nobody's perfect.

--andoy

News: Index Finger Length Reveals WHAT?

News

Research findings on differences between men and women with regards finger length and hormones during fetal growth leading to right-brain/left-brain thinking.

In short, the length of a man's index finger shows his feminine side.

--andoy

Yahoo! News - Porn Star Hits It Big as Best-Selling Writer

Yahoo! News - Porn Star Hits It Big as Best-Selling Writer

At least she knows how to write. There was once a comment that the reason Filipino men are poor lovers is because they do not read. Maybe I'll try to learn how to read in braille.

--andoy

MSNBC - Scammers can't pin this one on God

MSNBC - Scammers can't pin this one on God

Two women were convicted of running a religion-laced scam that duped more than 1,000 investors out of nearly $2 million by promising a cut of the late Philippines President Ferdinand Marcos’ fortune.

The story goes to tell that one of the two women, lived in a posh $5,000 a month hotel room since 1999. And that when they got caught, some of the victims, who already paid $1,000 each, still wanted to help them believing that this conviction will not help them get the returns on their investment. The expected returns? $1 million for each $1,000 invested.

--andoy

Spaghetti at Palitaw

Spaghetti at Palitaw

dalagang filipina
may bandannang tali sa leeg
nang hindi makita ang dibdib
nakatungo salubsob sa mesa
tutok sa tako
habang sasargo

hinto ang laro
ng mga binatang
nanonood naman
sa karatig mesa

mga kalarong babae
nagtatawanan sa bangko
nanonood nangangantiyaw
dibdib na naglulundagan
sa tali ng suot
blusang maigsi
litaw ang mayabang na pusod
at mababang pantalong
kita naman ay kuyukot

isang sargo
isang tira
buslo ang mga bola
isang sablay
sa palit ng manlalaro

saka tutuloy ang laro
ng karatig mesang
mga binata

--andoy

- = 0 = -

"Spaghetti" refers to spaghetti straps;
"Palitaw" refers to the sweet rice cakes with sesame seed and coconut; also refers to "palitaw na pusod" or peeking navel.

--andoy

Ang Kaharian Ko Buong Pagmamahal Alay Ko Sa Iyo

Ang Kaharian Ko Buong Pagmamahal Alay Ko Sa Iyo

sa buo kong pagmamahal sa iyo
alay ko ng buong puso
ang lahat ng akin ay angkinin mo
pagpapatunay nito
ang hawak mong buong lambing
kaibuturan at kaharian ko
hiling ko lang
na kung mawari ikaw ay magalit
huwag itong panggigilan
at higpitang buong ngitngit
kung saka-sakali at ito ay mangyari
aking mararamdamang
pait at sakit
buong mundo ay makaka-alam

--andoy

- = 0 = -

I'm not sure if I can finish this. As it is, this poem is not yet ready. It still needs a whole lot of revisions. Maybe even an overhaul. Twenty years ago, I would have hammered at it for maybe a week before I got satisfied or gave up. I guess I just don't have the perseverance I had then. Or I had a lot of time on my hands before.

--andoy

A Reason to Write

I'm looking at the possibility of writing on a regular basis: poems and web logs. Easy enough to commit, but finding the time is not easy. The point of the exercise is the discipline of writing poems. The need to write is related to the need to communicate in English, to practice writing, and make oneself understandable. With practice, I hope to make my words flow smoothly. I need to develop correct diction.

I now have a regular do-anything (comment, rant, diary, photo, poems, etc.) blog, and a novel-in-progress blog. I'm also a member of an email group of poets. The poems I submit first to my regular blog. Then I forward to the email group. I do need to make it a habit to write what I think. And think about what I write. Creating a focus on why and a definite output in terms of quantity and quality.

--andoy

(Untitled)

I once went on a trip
to millions-old hills
which rose from under the sea
like hundreds of coconuts bobbing on the waves
But what awed me in fact
was the journey through the trees
under the canopy
where the vehicle we rode rolled onwards
The forest I saw covering the road
with sun filtering down
on brown earth
forest so young
like soldiers standing ground
here to here to there to there
measured distance even to untrained eyes
joy I felt
disconcerting to see
a forest comedy and travesty

--andoy

Manong sa Iyong Pamamama-alam

Manong, manong, paano na po
ang araw-araw na aming aagarin
ngayong nauna ka na
at humayo sa tawag ng dapit-hapon

Iwan ninyong pamana
angking talino
kariktang tugtog ng matigas na daliring matagal ng nakalimot ng tipa
mumunting bubung at kapirasong lupa
balitoc na sanlain
at kaisang punlang handog sa kaitaguyod ng lahi

Hay, siya,
humayo na po kayo
nang masaya
matiwasay at magaang ang kalooban
na ang nag-iisang punla
ay narurok sa lupa
mabato man
at sa kainitan man ng araw
ay maaanggian din ng langit
kahit ambon lang ay mababasa din
yayabong din
mabato man ang lupain

Manong, manong
sa inyo na po ang biyaya
ng pahinga dulot ng mga bituin
ng nag-aagaw dilim

Dalhin kayo ng simoy ng hangin
sa landas ng takipsilim

--andoy/2004/October/23

Mr. Manuel Pilar

I have known Rene Pilar for about 21 years. And from the first we
met, we've argued. There might have been an unwritten agreement that
we would argue and fight and still be friends; that we we agreed to
disagree, again as friends. On and off, for the last two decades
we've met and discussed life. We've seen changes happen, and events
happen to us. Rene is an only child and I've treated him as an equal
and as a brother since we first met.

During that first year of acquaintance, I was introduced to Mr. Manuel
Pilar, Rene's father. A big guy with a gruff voice and a hearty
laugh. He grew up during the days when being from the province was
common enough. He became successful in his own right, as did the rest
of his siblings.

As I see how Rene grew up an only child yet level-headed, I can only
envy how the elder Mr. Pilar raised him. I cannot gather nor fathom
the internal musings of the older gentleman during the last ten years
or so. The only thing I can surmise is that there would have been a
good story to tell about whatever debate he had with himself regarding
his son and his life. Or that he was content with his decisions and
his life and thus would have been grateful that he had a son like
Rene.

I may be biased, being a friend of Rene. But then again, I can only
envy the elder Mr. Pilar for having a son like Rene. I hope that I
can raise my son in the same manner that Rene was raised.

Mr. Manuel Pilar died yesterday. From Rene's description of the
problems, it was a whole lot of complications. To say that he was not
well during the past year is an understatement. He had two cardiac
arrests/strokes during the past two years. That and other prior
health problems and hospitalizations.

Maybe it is a pity that Mr. Manuel Pilar had only one son. But then
again, maybe he saw Rene, was proud and was happy he had one, and that
was it.

As Rene described how his father behaved during last week, I think he
was happy with his life and with his son. And possibly, his last
thoughts were prayers for his son, and a smile for his dearly departed
wife who he would have missed for almost twenty years.

--andoy

Dona Estrella

Dona Estrella Ybiernas died recently. She was a spritely lady of 100+
years. (One does not discuss a ladies age. And, of coruse, at that
age, doesn't matter if you are by several years on the conservative
side.) A lovely lady with a lively memory and remembered all the
people who mattered. And had a strong opinion about such persons.

Whenever she saw me, she remembered that I once worked for the son of
an old acquaintance, and always repeated that the father was a great
pianist, but "mad and crazy" (her words). She kept updated with the
royalty of Europe, the various families and the love affairs. She
well remembers her trips abroad, and describes the cities, culture,
the people and her trips as if it was just yesterday. And everyday, to
keep her mind occupied, she'd take a ride in the car and go around
Makati, just right after sunset.

I first met her almost fifteen years ago. I never did know her age up
to several years ago when she celebrated her centenary. Frankly, I
didn't really care that she was that age. There were the
celebrations. Two masses at the Assumption College, a grand reunion
at Greenhills, the works.

With advanced age comes a personality. A different personality. Very
different in fact from the one you grew up with. I cannot compare
this world with the one she grew up in. There are few stories which I
heard about her, as narrated by her daughter who happens to be a
family friend. But these stories are not about the war and what she
did then, neither about the pre-war, nor about her life as a Dona in
the province. Rather these are quite modern stories about her health,
hospitalization and her shenanigans with the hospital staff.

I was supposed to go to her wake last night at the Santuario de San
Antonio at Forbes Park. I did not wake up early enough to have time
to commute there before my shift at the Call Center. I think, in a
way, it was providential. Maybe I can have some time to go there
before the interment.

The best I can say is that she might have died in perfect health,
except that old age got in the way. It's even possible that she
"lived as long as she wanted to and wanted to as long as she lived."

-- andoy

Novel in Progress

Just created a new blog for a novel in progress. I don't know when it will be finished. I doubt if it will be finished. I don't know what the story is.

Exciting isn't it.

The web address is http://andoynovel.blogspot.com

--andoy

Specialty Coffee's Caffeine Jolt Varies

Specialty Coffee's Caffeine Jolt Varies

Personally, I like to drink Dunkin' donuts coffee more than the specialty coffees from Starbucks. Some Starbucks baristas don't even know when they've burned the coffee.

Figaro over Starbucks. Any day.

Netscape News: Benefits of tea drinking

Home & Real Estate

Research which shows that tea is a better drink. I don't mind. I take coffee at work and tea at home.

--andoy

Netscape: Top 10 Superheroes

Celebrity

The article lists the top 10 actors in superhero roles. This one is about Tome Welling as the young Superman in "Smallville." There was a slight mistake, where Superman was tagged as a "Marvel superhero."

"Marvel superhero"? The writer did not do the research or doesn't know his comics. It's DC comics. Same with Batman and the rest of the Justice League.

--andoy

Forbes.com: Most Expensive Homes In America 2004

Forbes.com: Most Expensive Homes In America 2004

A short article linked to the Netscape website. From Forbes magazine, this is the list of the most expensive homes in America as they are listed on the market.

Really high profile envy.

--andoy

Don't Send These 7 E-Mails From Work!

From the Netscape website, one of the articles below about emails from work. I admit I've been guilty of:

• Item (2) before, but I've not been forwarding such scams any more.
• Partly of Item (3) as I send pictures but no links.
• Item (4) I make sure it is not on company mail, and that I am no longer working for that company.
• Item (5), same as Item (2), see above.

Am I reformed. I don't think so.

--andoy

-=0=-

Don't Send These 7 E-Mails From Work!

If you're not careful, your e-mail can get you fired.

Think that's a remote possibility? Think again. In 2003, 25 percent of
all companies canned a worker just for violating the firm's e-mail
policy. Most corporate policies regarding e-mail are fairly simple and
straightforward and usually grounded in good old common sense.

PCWorld reporter Daniel Tynan has identified seven types of e-mail
messages you should never send from work if you want to stay employed:

1. Sexually explicit messages
No matter how great your Saturday night date, don't recount the
details in an e-mail to anyone if you're using your work address. Just
as the date was personal, keep the details personal and use your
personal e-mail address if you must brag.

2. Scam spam
We're all familiar with that message from a deposed citizen of an
African nation who needs your urgent assistance so you can become a
million dollars richer. No matter how humorous or tempting you may
find the offer, do not forward it to friends or colleagues.

3. Pornographic photos
Dow Chemical. Hewlett-Packard. The New York Times. Do you know what
these three companies have in common? They have each fired employees
for sending e-mails to their work buddies with Web site links to porn
photos. Is your job and family's security worth that?

4. Messages denigrating the boss
Here's a fun fact of corporate life of which you may not be aware:
Your company probably has a system in place to monitor your e-mail.
Complain about the boss and chances are very high someone you really
don't want to read your tirade will see it--your boss. Vent verbally.
That's why there's a water cooler!

5. Jokes
Your colleagues may not share your sense of humor, especially when it
comes to off-color, sexist, or racist jokes. True story: After Chevron
employees passed around an e-mail titled "25 reasons why beer is
better than women," four female employees sued the company for sexual
harassment. The cost to Chevron: a whopping $2.2 million. Not much of
a joke, after all.

6. Sensitive, personal information
Hey, bosses: When it comes time for your employees' quarterly and
annual reviews, do it in person and not by e-mail. When you use e-mail
to communicate an employee's performance evaluation, salary package,
and Social Security number that can become part of the public record
should the company be investigated or get involved in a legal action.

7. Messages urging someone to break the rules
Breaking the rules is unethical. Breaking the law is illegal. Either
way, don't ever send an e-mail urging anyone in your company to do
anything illegal, such as destroying files. Exhibit A: Investment
banker Frank Quattrone, who was sentenced to 18 months in prison for
obstruction of justice when he sent an e-mail to Credit Suisse First
Boston employees encouraging them to destroy evidence requested in an
SEC investigation.

Yahoo! News - Deep Impact Space Probe Aims to Slam Into Comet

Yahoo! News - Deep Impact Space Probe Aims to Slam Into Comet

After more than 20 years of theoretical design and discussion, it will finally happen. A variant of this was a drop-down into the Jovian atmosphere and a spacecraft tailing the tail of Halley's comet. The latter project was not funded enough to get off the ground before the comet came around.

--andoy

Yahoo! News - Democratic Volunteers to Canvass Florida

Yahoo! News - Democratic Volunteers to Canvass Florida

In an effort to make sure that Florida delivers (?) the correct vote count.

La Identidad Femenina y la Terapia Floral

La Identidad Femenina y la Terapia Floral
written by Marisa Paula Scrocco

While I was in college I was writing letters with a girl my age from Argentina named Marisa Paula Scrocco. Now after 20 years, I found a person with the same name. I think I need to verify that this is her.

--andoy

Oktoberfest

In Germany, the Oktoberfest starts mid-September to the first week of
October. However, typically Pinoy, this is "celebrated" during
October. Last year, the first weekend (Friday evening) ot Oktoberfest
was at the Eastwood City and the traffic jam was up to about five
miles in every direction. Ortigas Avenue was jammed, same with Green
Meadows, White Plains, Katipunan Avenue, Boni Serrano, Marcos Highway
and Riverbanks Commercial. The traffic started to build up after
office hours, around 5:00pm and was heavy until the around 4:00 or
5:00 the Saturday morning. The first weekend usually has a larger
crowd.

Lat year, I did not know that the traffic would be that heavy. Since
I work the night shift I usually arrive around 11:45pm at my desk. I
arrived around 12:15 or 12:20. I walked from Ortigas Avenue, to Green
Meadows. At that point, I was feeling some pain on my shin and from
then on jogged to the office. About three kilometers in total. I
really felt out of shape.

This year the first weekend's Oktoberfest was held at the Metrowalk at
Ortigas. Of course, there was still a lot of traffic spilling over to
Libis. The third weekend though was at Eastwood City. Again there
was a traffic jam with vehicles at a crawl in the general direction of
Eastwood, but more manageable than during the first weekend.

This time around I was not late. I was coming from Makati, and
arrived at the office around 10:30pm, after walking from the corner of
Ortigas Avenue and C5. It was a brisk walk with no problems. I felt
the pain several hours afterwards. After puttering around I took an
hour nap (very shallow sleep) on my desk, and woke up at 11:58, just
in time to log in.

I really need to spend some time exercising. I am out of shape.

--andoy

Omar Sharif

Omar Sharif in a military coat. This was from Dr. Zhivago. From GQ November 1993.



Maybe not practical in the Philippines, but it does look good if you were in Europe.

--andoy

Hidalgo

I just Hidalgo on DVD. I was not able to see it during its theatrical release.

There are some movies which should only be shown in movie houses. This is one of them. The scenes do not work well on anything smaller than a house's wall! The desert! The photography! The desert photography!

Some days I would like to get my hands on a projector, paint the wall white and "throw" the movie on it. (I heard that the cheapest projector available on the market right now is around 50,000 pesos. Some day soon it will really be affordable as well as portable.)

Trivia: If I am not mistaken, this was Omar Sharif's 3rd movie as an Arabian nobleman. He was born in Egypt and has taken on a wide range of roles, including that of a Russian in "Doctor Zhivago" (which was filmed in Spain!). That was a great coat he wore in that movie!

--andoy

The Rule of Thirds and Digital Cameras

The present popularity of digital cameras came about because of the 1980's and 1990's boom in point-and-shoot 35mm film cameras. These are easy to use, no hassle, just point (automatic self-focusing) and shoot. Next step is to go to the photo print shop and have the film developed. If the user does not know how to take out the film (or even insert the film in the first place) the store clerk can assist you in taking it out -- and making sure that the film is not exposed in the process.

The digital cameras go up one evolutionary step higher. There is no film, so the pictures get downloaded and printed from the computer or if the user so wants, he can still get this printed at the mall's print shop. Since almost everyone with a digital camera also has an email address, logically, lots of these pictures also get sent to wherever friends, relatives, websites are.

With almost all major film (and camera and computer) manufacturers also creating their own line of digital cameras, it stands to reason that there might be more pictures being taken now with digital cameras than with film-based cameras. Because there is no film.

There was a glaring problem with point-and-shoot cameras. It was so glaring, that it differentiates and defines the quality between pictures taken by dedicated hobbyists and professionals using SLR cameras pictures taken by real amateurs or beginners with point-and-shoot cameras. Most of those taken by amateurs and beginners are center-oriented. The subject is typically in the center and in the (traditional) formal pose. This is still true of digital camera users of today. Even with the "free film" of digital cameras, this is still the case. This is partly because to the photographer it doesn't really matter how the photo is composed. If you do not have the "eye" for composition, and no inclination to study and develop composition, this will not happen.

The other reason, is because with early point-and-shoot cameras, off-center subjects are off focus. To a certain extent this is still true of digital cameras, as some cameras will not focus unless it is centered. Other cameras just default to center-focus and the user doesn't know the difference.

The "rule of thirds" is a simplified interpretation or rule of thumb in composing pictures. You divide the shot into 3, and have the subject occupy the left or the right -- rarely the center. Simple and easy to follow. And out of focus because the camera does not focus on the 2-thirds which is the left and right, but in the middle. Could have been a great composition, just that the picture is blurred. The only solution is to study the camera manual and experiment. Should take the regular user about 2 to 3 weeks to go through the camera features while taking pictures. And forever to remember how to do it right. Sounds almost like a manual SLR learning curve.

Which is why, sooner or later, I will get myself a digital SLR, so I can go full-manual again. I do sound like a throwback sometimes.

--andoy

Before Basho (a web site)

Basho (also pronounced Basho-o) was a Japanese poet famous for his haikus. In present-day Japan, there are still a lot of magazines dedicated to this poetic style.

Before Basho

Show Me Your Boobs

If you are interested in donating to cancer research...

Show Me Your Boobs

A Caluya Reunion

My cousins, the Caluyas had a reunion last Sunday. The week before, Kuya Ruben came in from Canada with his wife Ate Helen and daughter Natchie. Ate Evelyn was there, same with Kuya Benjie, wife Agnes, and all his 4 children. The only Caluya not there was Kuya Ruben's son Ruel.


Tatay, me and Kuya Ruben

Kuya Ruben and Ate Helen came back for a quick visit because of Ate Helen's mom. In fact, her family also had a hurried reunion of sorts, with their brood coming home from Mindanao, Ilocos Region, Texas (?), New Jersey and Spain.


Cousins with Kuya Ruben and Natchie

Natchie made it a point to join Kuya Ruben because she's getting married in December, moving to New Jersey (and from Toronto) and it might be several years before she can come back to visit.

Standing: Tatay Tony and Kuya Ruben; seated: Ate Helen and Mama Claire


Kuya Ruben's late mom, was my Auntie Lilian. She's the eldest of my mom's siblings and her only sister. There are only two of them left, Tiong Dodo is based in Iligan City in Mindanao with his own brood. (I guess it would be a while before Mama and Tiong Dodo would meet again.)


Seated: Ate Helen, Ate Agnes, Kuya Ruben; Standing: Kenneth, Lilia, Andoy, Kuya Virgilio and Ate Evelyn

Speaking about family and relations does make the discussion digress.





Tatay Tony, Kuya Ruben and Kuya Benjie.


Tatay Tony and Kuya Ruben discussing a point.



Kuya Ruben and Kuya Benjie



Cousins with Kuya Ruben and Natchie

Sunday shift

I have sore throat. I am coughing. I am sneezing. And I have no
voice. I think I am coming down with the flu. My whole body hurts.

I thought that there'd be only two of us on the shift Sunday night.
Turns out that Tonet was onboard also. I did some QA while there was
no queues. Though I was still forced to field some calls.

One lady was having a problem with her installation. We were not
understanding one another. She had a hearing aid. After some minutes
she asked if there was a Spanish-speaking agent, and just her luck,
it's a weekend and the agent, was not onboard. I just told her not to
install the software since her computer's OS can do the job on its own
without the software, and in fact, would not even allow the software
to be installed. Sorry about that. No voice and a deaf caller.

When you have no voice and try to take in calls, the callers just
happen to have long names like Lakshmirayana Rachamalla and
Stankiewiczs. Great.

At least there were no irate callers. Now, that would have been fun.

--andoy

Good News and Bad News

The good news is that Cielo did not get hospitalized. At least she
should be up and about by Monday. The bad news is that we're still
short-handed on Monday. Worse news is that I've sniffling my way
through the rest of today's shift.

I've got runny nose, my eyes hurt, my body aches, and I've got sore
throat. All in all a good reason to lie in bed and feel miserable.
Worse news, is that my cousin is in country right now and we're
supposed to have lunch with him today, Sunday, at their house in
Paranaque. Meaning no real sleep for me, as I'm going there with my
family straight from work. And then I'll be on shift tonight and
tomorrow, Monday evening. Day off is on Tuesday and Wednesday. I
think I can still go to work tonight but be absent Monday night.

Let's see what happens.

~o~o~o~

Kuya Ruben has been based in Canada these past 17 years. His two kids
practically grew up there. He's in the country right now because his
mother-in-law is sick. This might be the last time his wife, Ate
Helen might be able to talk to her mom. With them are his daughter
Natchie, who's going to get married in December. Cousin Ruel stayed
behind as he could not get away from work. They've had their shares
of problems but so far, their doing okay in Canada. Truth is, they
were already doing well here in the Philippines. But they were lucky
and they got to migrate before Canada even opened their borders to
Asians' family immigration.

For some time I did consider migrating, but I guess the time for that
has not yet come. Maybe later. Within five years, maybe. Easy
enough working here. Though the benefits seems to be getting eroded
the more you look at them. Some days, it just seems to be a dumb idea
NOT planning to leave.

What's different from shovelling snow at five o'clock in the morning
in the middle of winter with bailing out your house when the flood
waters come in through the door (or seep through the wall). I have no
idea as I have not experienced the former, but do not look forward to
the latter (which happens about 3 times a year).

Work days? I'm working 9:00 am to 6:00 pm Pacific Time (albeit in
Manila), which is only three hours different from working 9:00 to 6:00
pm Eastern Time.

I plan to be a Team Leader by next year. Most probably on a different
account within the same company. If not, then Team Captain with a
different company doesn't sound too bad. And then move up one more
step within two years afterwards, earning maybe 50,000 pesos a month.
If I don't get that, then maybe I'd be pushing for shovelling snow at
5:00am Eastern, before going to work as a short-order cook.

Doesn't make sense? My cousin's first job in Canada was as a kiosk
manager at the train station, selling cigarette and magazines and
what-not. That job lasted a day. He was a College Secretary in
Manila, working on that first job was a humbling experience he says,
and a far cry from his prior job experience. But he persevered. One
of his succeeding jobs was as a burger fast-food manager for several
years. Now he works for the Canadian government. Looking at it from
that viewpoint, I guess it should make sense.

I think I can handle that. I've worked as an accounting clerk for a
book store before. Among other jobs, I've been an insurance
underwriter, a real estate salesman, a collection agency
collector/messenger, programmer and systems analyst, computer
short-course trainor, project administrator, project manager, and as a
documentation specialist. I'm currently a technical support for a
Japanese software company, and looking upwards (because when you're at
the bottom ...)

At this point in my life, I am looking at College for my kids. I want
them to have the best education possible. I want them to have a good
foundation for their own life. I cannot see anything beyond that. A
house, too, with a car as gravy on top of that. I have my short term
goals (which is my career). And I have my long-term goals (which is
the education of my children). One is the foundation of the other.

Migrating? That is something to ponder.


--andoy

Inspector Parker

Great game!

MSN Games by Zone.com -- Inspector Parker

An addictive game, though I must admit that it is not for everyone.
Needs logic, but after a certain point, to have higher scores, you
must maintain your focus and concentration.

screen capture from Inspector Parker 




My current high score is 225,373.

--andoy

Weird Schedules

Friday and another day with weird schedules at work.

Cielo is down, out and hospitalized with pneumonia. Rino came to work
early exchanging shift with Rudi. Rudi is on board up to 8:00am.
Tatum and Geoff are on leave. I don't know when Tatum is supposed to
be back, but Geoff will be back Thursday next week.

I am still thinking of getting a vacation maybe on the last week of October.

--andoy

Artifacts

I still have some items from my college days at Los Banos.

I have this bus ticket as a bookmark for my copy of the "Lord of the Rings Return of the King." It's from 1980 when the bus fare from the Pasay City terminal to College, Laguna was 4.80 pesos.



This UPLB Form 5 was during the Summer term of 1981. Tuition for six units was 120 pesos. My instructor for Speech was Mr. Mike Ortega, who now works for Caltex, Philippines. One of the most popular instructors at Los Banos during his time. And one of the best teachers I have ever had.



This is not just a snippet. It is actually the whole poem, entitled "Taghoy." I wrote this March 6, 1986. Admittedly, a time of controversy, for me it was a time of ennui. People will always remember asking themselves "what next?"



--andoy


Posted by Hello

Migraines and other work-related health problems

I work in a call-center as a Customer Support Representative. The office is located at the Eastwood City Complex in Quezon City, where a lot of other call-centers are also located. If I may make a guess, there may be as many as 5,000 such agents like myself within that area housed in less than 10 buildings.

I've just been regularized and given a promotion and a pay increase. It's close to my residence so commuting is not a problem. And I can see a career path, either within the company or, at least, within the industry.

However, the issue is health. Working on the night-shift is not healthy. Since I started work on the night-shift during the fourth quarter of last year, I've had elevated blood pressure, almost constant headache, back pains, and more than the usual number bouts of migraine.

Lately, I wake up in the middle of the night, on my days off! Just when you get the opportunity to take extended sleep, your body wakes up!

There are days when I can only say to myself that I have to get a different job. Maybe I will. I'm giving myself another six months in my present position, then apply for the next higher position, and another year after that to apply for the next one up. That would be something to look forward to. If I can only hang on.

--andoy

Night Shift and Day Off

I lose count of the days
I have no idea
what day it is
getting lost in the middle of the week
somewhere
or something like that

middle of the week
day off
is all I know
it's my day off

the body hurts
movement pains me
from working
night shift

walking slowly in the morning
a different kind of tired
at end of work day
morning sun shining high
blinding

I'm just happy
it's my day off
two days off
I feel like saying it again
I'm just happy
it's two days off

though I lose count of the day
I know I'm free for today
smiling like crazy
happy


--andoy
6 October 2004

Print Ads and Computers

Nowadays, it's fairly common to see ads which show computers, laptops mostly, and every so often some desktops. The ads themselves might be for something not even remotely connected with computers: like the white laptop attached to the refrigerator like a magnet; or the appliance and electronics store showing hi-tech wares, which show several white laptops on display, and a wide 17-inch laptop; or the guy sitting in front of the laptop, the computer clearly showing a full keyboard and speakers on the side of the keyboard.

Funny thing though is that the lid (the back of the LCD screen), shows a white logo of Apple.




Majority of the computers on print ads or TV show Apple Mac computers. Yet you hardly see any on the workplace and even rarer in households. So far, I know of only 3 (maybe 4) who have Macs at home, and only one of them have OS X. In addition, I know of only one other who has a Powerbook of his own (of those with Macs at home, two of them also have Mac notebooks.)

In the United States, the Mac comprises only 10% of all PC's. Here in the Philippines, that number is very much less. And yet, if you watch TV commercials and print ads and take note of the computers shown you'd think that there are no Intel PC's in the Philippines.

I envy the Mac users. Think about these:

• No Mac viruses, worms or trojans. Or to put it another way, worms, viruses and trojans do not have any effect on the Mac.

• Practically no downtime. The Mac (OS 9, or X) very rarely crashes. Mac OS X, is a UNIX variant. Rock solid.

• For all intents and purposes, the Mac is (at least) 7 years ahead of its time compared to Windows: the Mac was GUI since its inception; tt had always used the mouse; before, it had always used SCSI drives, now it uses fast IDE and Firewire hard disks; onboard Firewire ports; support for multiple monitors (clone or extended view); USB mouse and keyboard (meaning only one cable from computer to the user); plug and play firewire hard disks which can be daisy-chained; with the Mac OS X, multiple disk volume spanning; support for multiple file system types.

• No camera drivers needed. True Plug-and-Play. Just connect the digital camera via USB and use iPhoto to download the contents. Doesn't matter whether it is USB mode Normal/DSC or using USB Mode PTP. With video cameras, just connect via the Firewire and use iMovie.

• Easy network connection, to a LAN or to the internet.

• Security. On the OS X, because it's UNIX, creating individual accounts mean that the account owners cannot access the contents, files or folders of the other accounts. On the LAN, there has to be explicit access to these accounts before being able to read anything on the computer. Worms have no access.

• Burning to CD. Easy, just insert the disk. Drag the files to disk, and when ready to burn, click on the burn button.

The downside?

• Practically no games. It does not have as many game titles as a PC. Sometimes the Java games on the internet are not even playable.

• There are a lot of programs which are Windows only.

All in all, I'd say a fair exchange.

A pair of Macs: An iBook G4 running OS X and an iMac G3 on Mac OS 9.2


--andoy

too long since I last wrote...

It was quite weird writing a poem after more than 10 years. There is
the apprehension, the slight fear, that the words will not flow any
longer. I still cannot write on demand, not while looking at a blank
piece of paper. "The Moth and Flame" started out as a few random
lines I thought of while in the shower. I started to write it down
two hours later. And finished it (or posted it to the blog) after
another 2 hours.

Rusty is the word which comes to mind.

--andoy

temper, temper

I vented my anger at the office last night, and only on the second call of the evening. I kicked my chair, and almost promptly, Ms. Merriam went to Ben and asked him to tell me to tone down as she had prospective clients as guests during that shift.

Several things:

• My nape has been hurting for the past four days.
• I've been having elevated blood pressure for the past few days.
• Two agents on the US line were absent.
• And the other agent was on day-off and could not be contacted to go on the floor.
• Leaving the US line with only 2 agents (me and Tonet) on a Monday (MONDAY!!!) shift.

Great!

What would have made it more fun was if I was given a citation right then and there.

We managed, but there were several repeat calls, a lot of problem calls, a patch/conference call from Florida, no last break for Tonet and me, and the Korean agent was forced to answer a US call, taking about 1 hour to finish.

Great shift. I'm just glad we did not have any irate callers last night.

--andoy

The Moth and the Flame

I am a moth
and I see the flame dancing
it is another flame
in a long memory
of dancing flames

I turn away deliberately
yet I notice
the flame comes nearer instead
I cannot feel the heat
yet
for I am far enough away not to feel it
yet

Though I can feel the last time I was singed
slightly burned
and I had to fly away fast
and far far away from that flame

I never do notice
the flame
coming near

--andoy
5 October 2004

HERO, a Chinese movie in a traditional rendition being shown in modern-day America

I just read several viewer reviews of "Hero" which were posted on the
MSN website. There were a whole lot of them, more than 250 such
posts. From what I read, it seems that either the viewers understood
what they saw and greatly appreciated the movie, or they have no idea
whatsoever.

The movie is not a martial arts flick. It is a stylized dance. It is
a costume play. It is an allegory. It is a philosophical discourse.
Kurusawa's Rashomon would be an equivalent.

I do agree with some of the comments that it is not worth paying US$10
to watch, but only if you did not understand it or expected something
else altogether. It is worth viewing over and over again, not because
you want to see the gore, but to see the drama. This is one of those
movies you would have been asked to see and submit a reaction paper or
critique in a creative writing or literature class.

One comment asked why the Jet Li character dies. That is a
no-brainer, almost like watching "Titanic" and wondering why the ship
had to sink. Or why Jesus was crucified in "The Passion..." Or even
why the Ali MacGraw character had to die in "Love Story." Other
movies come to mind: "The French Connection" (an american detective
in France?); "The Magnificent Seven" (why were they dissuading the
kid?); "Braveheart" (so Mel Gibson died?); "Ronin" (why were they
after the briefcase?); or "All That Jazz" (it's a musical? a comedy?
why were they dancing if he was dying?).

There will always be movies which others cannot understand. I have
given up trying to understand a movie. After watching "A Man and A
Woman," "Help!" and "A Hard Day's Night." I have decided that nothing
needs to make sense, only that it makes sense. Movies are truly an
art form. But only those movies which move a person or makes the
viewer empathize, only those can be considered as art.

Now when is the next James Bond movie coming out?


--andoy

Growing up and becoming a father to a girl

When I was in high school, girls were wearing denim pants. It was
still an age when girls were wearing mini skirts however, the Levi's
was becoming the dress of choice. I can't wait to get to college
where the girls were supposed to be wearing mini-skirts.


When I got to college I enrolled OUTSIDE of Metro Manila (partly
because of a scholarship grant and mainly so I can get away from my
high school classmates). And in U.P. Los Banos, lo and behold, the
girls don't wear mini-skirts. In fact, they don't wear anything sexy.
The sexiest you could get was white t-shirt and denim pants, and
that's the dressiest you could get. At the freshman dance, this was
also the dress code. Where were all the sexy girls?


I did find them, in the course of the next few years. And I had a
grudging respect of the t-shirt and denim clad female after that. But
it did rankle a bit that during the next fifteen years after Los
Banos, the fashion scene was drab and becoming drabber and more
corporate-like.


Almost twenty years later, the women's regular everyday pedestrian
fashion sense comes back to complete the cycle with a vengeance.
The women of today are brazenly sexy, even in white t-shirts and denim
pants. And here I am, frightened of the current fashion because I
have a 12-year old daughter. A year ago, she was skinny with any
curves. Five months after her first period, and she's developing
curves: buttocks, breasts and rounded thighs. (Okay, that may sound
like I'm describing a chicken order at KFC.) And I find myself,
second-guessing my wife on whether the clothes my daughter wears is
acceptable. Although I must admit, she looks like she inherited my
wife's thighs.


Acceptable? To whom? Acceptable to me, of course. That's my
daughter and no kid just off the street or maybe her classmate will
even think about getting close to her without going past me first.
That's my little girl.


Ah! The comment about "the sins of the father"? Karma? All too true, I guess.




--andoy

SS/DD

I worked this past evening. And it was not a particularly good shift.
The calls were good, just that I was not feeling well. My nape hurts
and I think I've got high blood pressure. I went to the clinic during
my first break and I had a BP or 130/100. Contrast this to my BP
yesterday afternoon of 120/80.

I wanted to call my boss and tell him that I can't attend work.
Couldn't make up my mind and just went to work instead. Turns out
that another agent had already informed him that she could not attend.
If I had not gone to work, that would have left the post to a single
support personnel. That would have been fun.

Couldn't go home straight from work, as I need to do some errands.
Will work this out somehow. I'm just glad Saturday is over. Those
two days off were a bummer. I didn't get any rest during that time.

I need a vacation.

--andoy
(sending email from the office)

On Writing

There have been several people who've noted that they like to read
what I've written. I consider this flattering. And I'll take it as a
compliment.

What boggles me is the next statement, they utter: "I wish I could
write like that," or some other variation. Sometimes it's just: "I
wish I could write." Now that's spooky.

I do not have an ordered mind. It goes from here to there, moving
from one idea to the next. Sometimes connecting disjointed thoughts
together, leaving me plenty of time to make these connections logical
by adding smaller steps in between.

I do not have a logical mind. I need to write my thoughts down in
order for them to make any sense. If I don't do that, the thoughts
stay in the background of my mind, popping up sometime in the near
future when it almost makes sense. Usually with several steps missing
in between (see above).

My writings do not make sense when I think about them, rather the
thoughts only make sense after I put them to paper (or virtual paper,
with regards computer files).

I remember high school when we were tasked to write a research paper.
We were told to write down the researches as scraps of data on index
card. These cards contain outlines, quotes, verbatim copies, draft
sentences or paragraphs, summaries, precis, etc. While researching we
were also tasked to submit the outline of the work in progress.
Several outlines in fact, as well as several drafts of the paper. The
process then boils down to being a jigsaw puzzle, with the aim of
making a complete picture which looks like the outline, or close
enough not to make any difference.

Until now, that's the way I write. I start with a an outline. I have
scraps of statements, isolated phrases, or paragraphs. And when I
write it down, I need to rearrange it somewhat to make some sense.
Okay, that was an understatement. In most cases, it never gets
finished because I could not rearrange it enough to suit me. In some
cases, I just don't bother about rearrange things. Quick and dirty
but it does get done.

Maybe sometime soon, if I stick to writing regularly, it would be an
easier process. In which case, the only remaining questions would be
what to write about and how do I begin. I guess one thing would not
change: the hardest about writing is staring at an empty page.


--andoy

Pinoy Poets

I just joined this website. Short story: I saw one of the members post a want/help ad on a yahoo! groups. I got curious and saw that they have a website, a yahoo! groups mailing list and a blog page. Looks cool. I might not be able to attend any meetings, but what the hell.

I haven't written any new poem for the last 13 years or so. I may have, but I'm not sure where those are or where it is. I would have known I had written any IF I had been writing poems with any regularity. I doubt if I did.

Pinoy Poets

Me and my daughter Darwi

New Glasses for Darwi

We're buying new glasses for Darwi today.  This will be her Nth pair of glasses!

She started to wear glasses when she was 5 or 6 years old.  There were vague hints that she needed glasses.  She had to go near the TV set to see anything on it.  In school, she needed to be in front row of seats because she was not able to copy from the blackboard.

There was an early incident which should have clued us in to her poor eyesight.  I was reading a book to my kids, Kenneth and Darwi, before going to sleep, and part of what I regularly did was ask Kenneth to read the book.  They were prone, looking at the book, with the word in the direction of Kenneth.  Darwi was in the opposite direction, prone and looking at the book upside-down.  While Kenneth was reading, Darwi was "reading" ahead of him.  She had already memorized the book (or page) from prior bed-time story telling.  That evening was fun.

We bought the last pair of glasses December last year.  The first problem occurred early in the school year, late June or early July.  One of the lenses came off.  She tried to repair it by using super glue.  And, of course, using too much super glueas she did not know to use it, much less how to repair the lens.  The only problem was that one of the screws came off and this led to the loose lens holder (is that what you call it?).  For the past several months, the replacement screw I used gets to become loose more often, and whenever the replacement screw comes loose the lens holder gets to be a little more loose, and not holding the lens tight. 

Vicious cycle story revisited.

Now while I was repairing it yet again, now the lens broke.  It was plastic.  And since it broke while I was handling it, it was my fault.  Of course.  In my opinion, better it got broke while I was repairing it than while my daughter was using it.

I like that story.  It's better than the ones about another pair of (red eye-frame) glasses.

--andoy

Me and my son Kenneth